The Perfect Fit

Eph 5:31

For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.

"God gives imperfect women to imperfect men so they can be heirs together of the grace of life and become something more together than either one of them would be alone."

When each one of us was formed of God in our mother's womb, God placed inside of us, a void that only He could fill. Many, over time begin to feel that void in the depths of their soul, and begin trying to fill that emptiness, but nothing seems to fit just right.

Some try drugs to fill the void, some try relationships, some try pleasures, but all seem to be a temporty fix. Like a bucket with holes. It holds water but just for a few minutes, and needs a continual supply, or else it will be just as empty as before.

The only thing that can fill that void is the Lord Jesus Christ! Some may scoff and say, "I tried Jesus and it didn't work for me." Chances are you only had a head knowledge of Jesus. When all we have is a mental understanding that Jesus died for sinners and dont make it personal it is just "religion".  It is just a tempory fix for the void and emptiness you feel. Only by truly accepting Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Saviour will that hole get filled, and not just filled but perfectly filled.

 Jesus didn't just die for our sins, HE DIED FOR YOUR SINS. He longs for you to see your sin as the very reason he died on the cross. As the very nail and hammer that held up on the cross. He longs for you to hate your sin, because of its wickedness and because of what it took to redeem us; the brutal death of a precious Saviour. He longs for you to turn from that sin to Him. To desire in your heart that you no longer want to sin, but want that Salvation that can only come from Him.

1Cr 6:17

But he that is joined unto the Lord is one spirit.

When you truly experience Jesus, it will change your life. If you say "I have been saved", but there is no real change in your life or actions, ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to you if you have truly met Jesus and accepted His Gift of Salvation, or if you just have a head knowledge.

Marriage and relationships are very much the same way. 

Many are seeking for someone to fill the void of emptyness in their heart. They search and search and try and try. They find one, and that person seems to fill the void. Because they give them attecntion, gifts, love, but its just a tempory fix.

Having a boyfriend/girlfriend may seem to be the answer to your loneliness, but in reality it is just a temporary fix. You see, if you are seeking a mate for the sole purpose of curing your loneliness, then you are starting a relationship based on selfish motives. (What they can do for you). It wont be long before this relationship turns south, because in order for a relationship to be healthy both have to be giving. And if you are not getting what you desire you will move on to someone else who will give it. This creates a vicious cycle. So vicious that when you do get married and it doesn't turn out the way you imagined and you are not getting what you desire you will seek it elsewhere. In Divorce. --- Let God show you how to stop that cycle!

Become content with being single, strive to use the time you have as a single person to prepare for your future spouse, and focus all of your energy on serving God. Because while you are single you will have a desire to please only the Lord, but when you are engaged or married your focus will tend to shift more to trying to please your mate. Use your time to prepare! Being single is not a curse, but a gift. It's a time for you to prepare to be the best spouse you can be for the one you will love with all of your heart. What better way to show your love then to seek the Lord and prepare for them!

But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried careth for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord:But he that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please [his] wife. I Corinthians 7:32-33

Dont seek just anyone, seek THE ONE (God) and let

 THE ONE lead you to the one He has created for you. -A-

God has your perfect fit out there!
Just wait for them!

Just like God created you with a void that only he could fill, He has created you with a void that only 'the one' He has created for you can fill. Let look at the illustration of the Jigsaw puzzle"


I'm sure you have worked a jigsaw puzzle at least once in your life. - Sometimes you can be working on a puzzel and find a piece that looks like a perfect fit. You look at it, its the same color, same shape, same style, and it looks just about perfect...BUT when you try to put it in, it just doesn't fit right. So you try and try and finally you say "why wont this piece fit, it has to be the one, but it just doesn't seem to be going in." 

So you set it aside and work on the rest of the puzzle and after about 15 minutes you find a new piece that fits perfectly in the spot that you were working on before. You hold the two pieces up side by side and they look so identical, but one is a perfect fit and the other is not. Its an impostor! And all it has done is wasted your time and energy and left you frustrated. It has taken the time that you could of been using to make more progress, and instead has caused you to lose time that you will never get back . (The wrong piece in some cases it can lead to trouble - more on this topic at a later time)

Dont look for the close fit, look for the perfect fit!

So it is with relationships, God has a perfect fit for you, but often times because we dont let God lead us to the one, we end up with a fit, but its not the perfect fit.

God has shown me the perfect fit for me in Samantha, and God has the perfect fit for you.

Just like God is the perfect fit for your soul (Salvation) He is also the perfect fit for the soul of the one he has created for you. 

Just like God is the perfect fit for your soul, your mate is the perfect fit for you, the world call this person your soul-mate. But God just says "It's your mate, the one I created for you. Why did you spend your time and energy looking, when all you had to do was wait and prepare and I would bring them to you." 

He has perfectly matched you up since before the world was created and is bringing you together in His perfect way and timing.

If you are not saved, the perfect fit is out there, His name is Jesus Christ, let him save you. Realize that you are a sinner, and that He died in your place for the very sins you have commited today, but that he wants to save you and take you to heaven.  If you ask Him to save you, He will save you.

For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. Romans 10:13

If your saved, and single then God has your perfect match out there. Dont settle for a temporary piece to fill the void. Spend your time in preparation and service. Chances are your mate will be looking for someone who is sold out, serving the Lord. They will be impressed and grateful by how much you have prepared for them, and them alone.

Eph 5:31

For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.

Bethany’s Betrothal

Bethany Olsen, age twenty-two, desires nothing more than to be happily married. After having faced three heartbreaks, things aren’t looking so good. Realizing she can no longer endure the pain of rejection, Bethany promptly turns her back on courtship and leaves the choice of her mate entirely up to God. Not until she truly learns to put her full faith and trust in God, is Bethany granted the Divine betrothal she has been prayerfully seeking.----Sarah Lynn Shade 

Fist off let me say, that as an Independent fundamental Baptist, it is a great blessing to find books that are written by people of like faith, it produces a sense of security and enjoyment for me as I read. This is one of those books.

This is where it all began for me. I had never heard of Divine Betrothal, but somehow in my heart I always knew it existed. Even before I was saved I just believed that there was one person for me. I never felt like wasting my time with someone who wasn't the one I was going to marry. After I got saved and over time I just grew to accept what is commonly called "courtship". 

By courtship I mean the idea that you think this could be the one so you enter a relationship. This relationship has rules like no touching or kissing or being alone, but it is mostly designed to see if the couple is compatible. If they are, they progress to an engagement if not they break up and seek another relationship with someone else. In my experience "courtship" is nothing more then "Christian dating". And in most cases leads to heartbreak. Its a traumatic event to spend any time with some one that you think might be the one, to give pieces of your heart to them, only to find out that one or both feel its not right. 

I was listening to the vice-president of a Bible college preach and he said that "these young people (speaking of the students) are at least four people removed from who they will marry." I got to thinking about that. That means that at the best, there will be 6 broken hearts for every successful dating/courting relationship that ends in marriage. In my heart I was grieved and said "there has to be a better way". Anyone who has had a broken heart will sympathise and recognize how painful of a statistic that is. God never designed for us to have to date around to find the one that He created for us.

We have a dangerous combination, that of loneliness and courting/dating, and all it is producing is a lot of young people who are missing the perfect will of God for their lives, and causing many young people to live in depression and heart break. Instead of young people focusing on God and preparing for their future they are caught up in the boyfriend/girlfriend game.

 I know the feeling of loneliness. I know what it is like. I used to go to the mall and see all the "happy couples". It seemed like everyone had someone, and I had no one. When that feeling sets in, it can be very easy to seek a relationship for the very sake of companionship. In fact most boy/girl friendships end in a relationship because both have that desire to be loved and cared for. You might be in Bible college right now and you see all the "happy couples" and you think, "When Lord, when will my special someone come along." Im here to tell you, that if you leave the choice up to Him, He knows who that person is, He knows where they are, and He is preparing you for each other. The perfect will of God is alive right now somewhere, pray for them, prepare for them, and wait for them. If you are not 100% sure this person is God's will for your life, then wait, pray and seek the guidance of your parents and pastor. In fact I will go so far as to say that getting your authorities permission is a key to making sure you are doing it God's way.

Gen 2:22

And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.

God impressed upon my heart one day, after nights of Bible study and reading several books most specifically Bethany's Betrothal, that if God made one woman for Adam (Eve) and brought that one woman to Adam in his perfect timing then God would surly do that for this Adam (Me). God used this thought. "Adam how can you believe I will save your soul and take you to heaven when you die, but you can't believe that I will bring you the one I have created for you, to you in my time."  I pondered that thought over and over and decided to surrender to that truth.

I invite you to read the book that helped me finally trust God.  It is part of a series of books and even though it is listed under ladies, it has been very helpful. In fact 3 of the series of books is written from the man's perspective.

I invite you to do a little light reading and explore the world of Bethany's Betrothal. This book can be found at http://lcbplansing.org/Books/Ladies.

I suggest that you read them in order. And make sure to save the last book for the end.

You wil never regret doing things God's way. Keep checking back regularly as I continue to expand on what the Lord has taught me. God's way is the best way!